Brb…making tea. Back, glass cup in hand. As my tea steeps in my very cool tea infuser cup, I look at the package for this blend. “Energize. Believe in yourself & be unstoppable.” That’s quite a claim for an herbal tea blend. As I glance out the window at yet another dark and rainy day, a little “unstoppable” would be a good thing.
So, I’m falling a bit behind on my dance creations and it makes me uncomfortable – or does shaking up how I’ve always done things make me uncomfortable? Or was it an uncomfortable situation yesterday that shook my confidence? No one else may have noticed, but what if they did? The truth is, all of us have pieces of ourselves that we hide, bury – because we need to, for our own sanity. To let go for a little while, sometimes to be snapped right back into it and our safe bubble shattered for that moment in time.
Then, we breathe. A deep breath. We remind ourselves that its ok. That what was isn’t anymore. That we are safe. And loved. That we do good things and can be our self, embrace what’s inside. That we are stronger than we know – so much stronger.
As I breathe and study the picture above, the words “I AM ME” roll through my head. I choose do to what I love. Create what I feel. Trust and believe in just this, and all will fall into place. Perhaps not immediately, but over time…one step at a time. Even the tiniest of steps are a movement forward to whatever you desire. Sometimes I wish there was a fairy that would clear away the clutter, the endless train of things standing in my way…but then I realize, what stands in the way the most is my own self, not taking those baby steps. That inner voice saying “this is too hard…it will never happen…you can’t do this”.
It is a brave thing to face the turmoil inside. The inner demons, the past memories, fears and doubts, and overcome them. It is a brave thing to challenge the status quo and take those first steps, small as they might be. It is brave, and right, to see yourself as Strong. Powerful. Beautiful. Intelligent. Creative. To be forgiving of yourself.
This is a mere hiccup in this moment, as new things are aligning – bringing with it a bit of discomfort and fear of the unknown. No one can do it for you. It has to be you.
I like this Twitter post by Alicia Keys:
“If those you are with don’t encourage the change and growth in you.. maybe they aren’t the ones for you! Keep shining 💞🌈 “
In the course of things, I’ve also started working on getting back into better habits. I find that I seem to dehydrate easily – forget to drink water (especially when focused/creating) and this makes me tired, moody, and unable to concentrate.
Another step is watching Ted videos, which I used to do regularly – inspirational, thought provoking, beautiful. I have one to share with you today, and upon watching it I realize that the spaces where I spend the most time RL are bland like those demonstrated. That adds something to consider…how much does the environment around you effect your emotions and creativity?
I’m not quite sure I feel unstoppable, but I do feel more energized and ready to keep taking those steps. I can silence that negative inner voice in my head, do what I enjoy to the most of my ability and celebrate that. Isn’t that the way it should be?
Blessed be 💞